Why Do I Feel Overwhelmed All the Time?

Sometimes there isn't one big thing that's wrong.

It's everything.

Work is busy. Your phone never seems to stop. There are people relying on you. There's something that needs sorting at home. You're trying to keep up with relationships, money, appointments, responsibilities and all the everyday things that don't disappear just because you're tired.

Individually, you might be able to deal with each of them.

Together, they can start to feel like too much.

If you've found yourself thinking “Why do I feel overwhelmed all the time?”, you're certainly not alone.

““Maybe I’m just overthinking it””

When everything feels like another task

Feeling overwhelmed can be difficult to describe because life might look completely normal from the outside.

You're still going to work.

You're still replying to messages.

You're still looking after everybody.

You're still getting things done.

But it feels as though you're constantly running at capacity.

Something small can suddenly feel enormous.

An email you would normally deal with in five minutes sits unanswered. Someone asks you a simple question and you feel irritated. Plans you were looking forward to suddenly feel like another obligation.

You might find yourself thinking:

“I just need everyone to leave me alone for a bit.”

That doesn't necessarily mean you don't care about the people around you.

Sometimes it means you've got very little left to give.

Your mind doesn't get a chance to stop

One of the hardest parts of feeling overwhelmed can be the inability to properly switch off.

You finally get into bed and your brain decides that's the perfect time to think about tomorrow.

Or last week.

Or something you said three months ago.

You might constantly feel as though you've forgotten something.

Even when you're technically resting, you're mentally going through everything that still needs doing.

The NHS lists feeling overwhelmed, difficulty concentrating, struggling to make decisions, constant worrying and changes in sleep among the ways stress can show itself. NHS

And when that continues for a while, even simple decisions can start to feel exhausting.

It isn't always about being “too busy”

Sometimes reducing your diary helps.

But overwhelm isn't necessarily just a time-management problem.

You can have a relatively quiet week and still feel completely drained.

There may be relationship difficulties in the background. Financial worries. Grief. Family responsibilities. Work pressure. Changes in your life. Something from your past that you've never really had the opportunity to process.

Sometimes you've simply spent a very long time putting everybody else's needs before your own.

Stress is often connected to feeling under mental or emotional pressure, and there isn't always one obvious cause. NHS

That's why telling yourself to “just get organised” isn't always the answer.

When did you last have space for yourself?

Not space to watch television while answering messages.

Not an hour where you're mentally planning tomorrow.

Actual space.

Space where you don't have to solve something, look after somebody, make a decision or pretend that everything is fine.

For some people, counselling becomes one of the few places where that can happen.

You have permission to stop.

To talk.

To think.

To say the things you've been editing before saying them to everybody else.

You don't need one big reason to come to counselling

People sometimes worry that their problems aren't significant enough for counselling.

They'll say:

“Nothing terrible has happened. I'm just struggling.”

That's enough.

Counselling doesn't have to begin with a crisis.

You might simply know that you're not feeling like yourself anymore.

Perhaps you're more irritable.

Perhaps you're exhausted.

Maybe you're struggling to enjoy things.

Or maybe you've become so accustomed to pushing through everything that you don't actually know how you're feeling.

Those are all things we can explore.

Making sense of what's underneath it

When you're in the middle of everything, it can be difficult to see what is actually taking the most out of you.

Counselling gives us an opportunity to slow that process down.

Rather than immediately trying to make the feeling disappear, we can become curious about it.

What's been happening?

When did things begin to feel this way?

What are you carrying?

What expectations are you placing on yourself?

Where are your boundaries being stretched?

What do you need?

You don't need to know the answers before you arrive.

Finding them can be part of the work we do together.

 

You are allowed to stop for a moment

Feeling overwhelmed doesn't mean you're failing at life.

Sometimes you've simply been carrying too much for too long.

And you don't have to wait until you can no longer cope before doing something about it.

If life feels relentless at the moment, counselling can give you somewhere to put some of that weight down.

At PitStop Counselling, I offer a calm, confidential and non-judgemental space where you can talk openly and begin making sense of how you're feeling.

You don't have to have the right words.

We can start wherever you are.